What I'm Reading: This Is Getting Old

 

Susan Moon has written widely on Buddhist topics, as former editor of Turning Wheel (the newsletter of the Buddhist Peace Fellowship) and as the author of engaging works such as The Life and Letters of Tofu Roshi.

She recently published This Is Getting Old: Zen Thoughts on Aging with Humor and Dignity. And I've had the pleasure of reading it.

This is not a treatise on aging, nor is it an encouragement to practice. Rather, it's a candid (thus, dignified) look at the indignities of living with an older body (thus, the humor).

Moon tells wonderful stories based on her own life and uses her experience to look beyond the obvious, as in this example:

I have come to the point of diminishing returns as far as sitting cross-legged goes . . . now in my sixties I have arthritis in my knees . . . When I consulted an orthopedist last year . . . he scolded me for sitting cross-legged. I now have doctor's orders to sit in a chair. I could have asked him for a note for my teacher, but I didn't need to, because these days, fortunately, all the Zen teachers I know have become tolerant of chair-sitting. It's allowed, even though it's not exactly de rigueur. The harsh taskmaster within is the one who still gives me trouble.

And then there's sex, a topic that comes up more than once in This is Getting Old:

I used to like sex a lot if I liked the person, but when I didn't have it, I didn't miss it much. Sometimes I missed the person. Saying I miss sex is like saying I miss wearing my hiking boots, when what I miss is standing at Paiute Pass watching the cloud shadows run across the lake below.

No matter our chronological age, each of us is older than we were just a moment before.

And we can benefit from the companionship of those who have looked closely into this matter.

Comments

[Shiju Ben Howard]

Barry -

Thanks for this post.

With humor and insight, Susan Moon's essay using a chair convincingly validates that practice. For older practitioners, or for those who cannot sit comfortably in one of the cross-legged postures, the essay is essential reading. It can be found at http://www.tricycle.com/essay/leaving-lotus-position?offer=dharma.

Gassho,

Ben

[Perplexity]

I'm reading this one right now too! So far, I love it. I'm middle aged now, but consider myself an "old person in training" as I'll be there soon enough :) and I work with the elderly population. It's nice to see her sense of humor...part of aging well is keeping a sense of humor, as I've seen again and again. I met a wonderful 90 yo woman with a pelvic fracture (very painful) who kept laughing right through the pain. This is how I want to be.

[Genju]

There was a lovely discussion group on the Tricycle Community site with Susan Moon. I love her light-heartedness. I read a medical report from my doctor one day and it referred to "this able-bodied woman, in her 6th decade"... I haven't stopped quivering in fear since! :-)

[bob]

I can relate. I have hip issues, and when I sit(half Lotus), and the session ends I have trouble getting my locked hip to move.
Maybe this doesn't make me a bad, or failed, person.

Your insightfulness will never, like me, grow old.

[Suzanne]

I would miss sex.

[Jomon]

"Old person in training." Wonderful! Me too!

[Barry Briggs]

I took off my training wheels a few years ago.

Thanks, everyone!

Barry